


A Tale of Dreams

by AmyIssen



Category: Undertale (Video Game), Yume Nikki | Dream Diary
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Madotsuki is a broken 16-year old girl and Frisk is her hopeful 8-year old sibling, Non-Binary Frisk, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV First Person, Selectively Mute Frisk, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-09 08:00:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5531861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyIssen/pseuds/AmyIssen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When life becomes unbearable to Madotsuki, she locks herself in her room and dreams. When there's nothing left but nightmares, she fears what may come next.<br/>And when her sibling runs away to Mount Ebott, the mountain that has been surrounded by eerie legends and imminent danger for millennia, she gathers all of her forgotten bravery and defies her own demons to save them.<br/>What she doesn't expect is the story that will unfold as both of them fall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, people! I'm finally publishing a fanfic for the first time. (Well, a decent fanfic at least, because I'd rather forget 2008.)  
> Keep in mind that even if I'm confortable enough with my english to publish this, I'm still far from being fluent and this fic is completely unbeta'd so please be patient with me. If I make any mistake, I'll be glad if you point it out!  
> To the story itself: I'm planning on keeping the story as lighthearted as I can without leaving Yume Nikki's dark essence behind. Since I know there are a lot of theories about what happened to Madotsuki and what led her to lock herself in her bedroom, I decided to leave it up to interpretation so that I wouldn't ruin anyone's theories/headcanons, though I have my own personal interpretation and you might guess what it is.  
> With no further ado, I welcome you to the Dreamland, to the Underground and to these young lives, corrupted by the world and yet still holding on.

**Day 23 - 2:52 am**

I'm scared of a lot of things; Terrified, to be precise.

My parents always felt like my safety was more important than theirs. They raised me to be cautious; To think twice before any choice I made, to never trust anyone until I was a hundred percent sure.

And perhaps that was the reason of my downfall.

I should have been more cautious. I should have been less trustful.

I should have been _stronger_.

 

And yet, they think they're always right about me.

They won't even listen.

 

For the past few weeks, I have slept.

The same dream repeats, over and over and over again.

The nexus opens itself, welcoming me to its wicked and infinite world of terrible memories.

The same places, the same images, the same... monsters.

It's driving me mad.

I don't know how much longer I will be able to stand it.

I should be sleeping again soon. There's still one of them left.

Good night.


	2. Sleeping is Just Training to Die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Quick mention of blood, death, and some unsanitary behavior.

  
_3... 2... 1..._

 

A dream always begins at the balcony. And that's where I found myself.

Again.

What the hell was I thinking anyway?

I couldn't postpone this for much longer. It's been nearly a month now. I could have easily gotten rid of this task in one night, and yet I stayed. Finding every secret. Going through every door. Stabbing whoever I felt like stabbing. Getting trapped. Walking so far I couldn't find my way back.

Painful memories and pointless wandering aside, I could learn to miss this. Well, I could but I won't. I won't be able to anyways.

Just one last time, I wanted to explore. One last time to find out if I missed something. Anything.

As I walked away from the balcony, I gazed at the dreamy sky above me. Its colors danced in a sunset ballet with dark clouds moving in an unnatural speed. A lovely shade of blue, mixed with soft tones of orange. I didn't appreciate it enough when I could. 

I let out a heavy sigh and walked through my room, it always looked more tidied up in the dream world and it was way less quieter, pushing open the door that led me to the nexus. I climbed on my bicycle effect and chose one of the many doors the room offered me; the first one to the left: A metal door with a huge red circle on it. If I was really going to do this, it would be fast. And clockwise, preferably.

The number world didn't look any different, as expected. The same annoying noise reverberated through its walls and the same monsters wandered aimlessly, as if they didn't notice my presence. The walls moved in its usual wicked fashion, glowing ever so slightly. The bloody numbers on the glass floor silently begged me to add, multiply and divide them. Being a math nerd at least gave me a hobby.

7 + 7 + 6 + 4 =

24.

6\. 17.

Turn left.

15\. 30.

あ.

20.

Right. Left. 

22\. 96.

Left. 

12.

_Wrong._

Before I noticed the dead end ahead of me, the bike had already crashed against it, throwing me off balance and making the wall mumble in protest.

I cursed under my breath just loudly enough that only I could hear it, not that anyone else could anyways. I would have turned around immediately, if something didn't catch my eye.

The number world had a very peculiar decoration on its walls, which didn't really surprise me, since all the worlds didn't have a consistent, or logical, pattern to it; Zippers, with legs and arms that moved seamlessly or stood still, blue face watching on top of it. I had already tried more than once to open them, to no avail, but this particular zipper looked odd.

Its face looked like what it would normally look, except its mouth was hanging open, white on the inside, and it looked somewhat... sad. It gurgled when I spoke, as if it was sentient. Trying to answer me. Its orange members moved slowly, twitching once in a while.

Hopping out of the bicycle, I stood in front of it, unsure of how to approach this new event. I fiddled with my skirt for a moment, thinking, then looked up.

"Hey...?"

Despite my pathetic choice of greeting, the monster convulsed and mumbled back something that sounded like what I just said.

I gulped, trying to talk one more time. "Do you understand me?"

It imitated me again, this time way more louder, making me flinch. Perhaps it didn't really want to talk.

Raising my hand and standing on my toes, I waved in front of its face; not really causing a reaction. Still on my toes, I tried pulling the zipper down; it didn't budge.

Figures.

In one last resource, since there was no way in hell I would give up this, I reached out to my effects interface. The hovering futuristic-like screen threw me off when I first used it but, by now, it was the least weird thing I had found in these dreams. My heart skipped a beat at the sight of all the effects collected, but I pushed the feeling aside. I could think about it later.

Hand moving towards it, I reluctantly selected the knife, clutching it on my right hand. If this didn't work, I didn't know what else would.

Breathe in.

With one swift move, the knife pierced the wall, sending the monstrous decoration into a despairing convulsion. It shrieked, louder than most monsters I had killed, waving its members for seconds that felt like hours, then quieted down, blood overflowing from its mouth. As it went completely still the zipper opened.

I couldn't help but to smile. Finally something worked my way, at least.

I hesitated before stepping into the 'door'. Of course, I didn't fear it, but it still felt intimidating.

There's nothing left to be afraid anymore, I guess.

 

The room that opened wasn't as different as I expected. It was narrow and surrounded by darkness making it hard I to tell where the end of it was. Maybe it was endless, I wouldn't be surprised. I disabled the knife effect, storing it back to the effects interface, and started to walk. 

Each step I took echoed hardly beneath my feet. Every time I breathed in my lungs begged for more air, but there was none to be found, I could feel my heartbeat drumming in my ears, making me wonder if I was supposed to be here after all. The more I walked, the narrower the room seemed to get.

When I considered turning back, I spotted light amongst darkness, it didn't look so far away, but it looked so dim that it seemed much farther. As I got closer, I could make the shape of stairs beneath it. Carefully, looking down at my feet once in a while, I approached it and spotted something more.

Besides the stairs, a figure stood. Big, but not as big as The Thing with the Quivering Jaw, just for reference. It was red like meat, though some colors like green, pink and yellow seemed to glow from its body, and a permanent smile was plastered on its face. It eyes seemed to focus on something beyond the darkness. And then, slowly, it turned to me.

I cringed, looking away.

With one hand, the thing stroked the rail of the stairs. Breaking the silence with a loud piercing screech each time, almost like nails scratching a black board. Louder and louder each stroke.

"You like this. Admit it."

It didn't spoke but I heard it anyways. I couldn't describe the voice if I tried, for all I know it could have been my own.

Enough of this.

Stumbling on my feet, just now noticing I had been frozen in place, staring at it fiercely, I rushed up the stairs, avoiding further eye contact with the monster. 

No more than ten steps ahead, there was a door. 

Made of wood. No screaming colors, no blinking lights. Awfully familiar.

Is it really worth it? Should I just take a hint and go away while I still can? 

I turn the handle. It's so cold it burns.

I enter. 

...

_When death finally reaches you, it's quick. And just so you're prepared, it isn't pretty._

 

_When fear becomes reality before your eyes, you'll know it's there._

 

_And when the angel of death calls for you, don't forget to take one last gasp for air._

 

_You'll need it._

...

Knock, knock, knock.

A pause.

Knock, knock, knock.

Shuffling under the blankets, I sit on my bed, still sweating coldly, gasping.

I'm awake again, alright.

Light seeped through the glass of my windows, falling everywhere but at the bed, though the darkening sky suggested a storm was near. The white noise of my TV merged into the background, almost unnoticeable. Unnoticeable enough that I forgot to turn it off last night. My video game console sat on the same spot it did for weeks, starting to collect dust. There wasn't much to play anyways, so I didn't care.

There was a moment of silence in which I waited, expecting another set of knocks. My eyes met the ground, finally noticing the pillows I knocked out of my bed when I woke up, and stayed there.

The silence mocked me, repeating over and over what I already knew and accepted.

I'm a coward.

There's proof all around me. My locked door; the cardboard box with the most food that didn't need cooking I managed to store on it, though it was bound to be empty soon and I had no plan to fix that; the dust covering my messy room and the clothes I've been wearing for 23-- no, 24 days straight, and finally, the knocking.

Everyday, exactly every hour, so softly that it took me some time to notice it the first day it happened. A perfect schedule and enviable commitment, I had to admit.

For the few hours I spent awake during the month, the only thing I looked forward to was the knocking. It was the only thing that connected me to the world.

It didn't take a genius to know who knocked.

My parents didn't care, or at least they stopped caring after the first week or so. I overheard them talking by then about how I would "leave when I was ready".

There was only one person in this cheap moldy apartment that still cared. 

Although part of me didn't hope for something else, something in my heart just waited.

I only waited because I missed them. 

The single thing that made me feel guilty about what I was doing was Frisk. They didn't deserve someone like me in their life, but, I didn't want to leave them alone either. They were already such a lonely child, and my parents never really cared about them with the strength they cared for me. I never got why. I thought that not having me around would help, that they would pay more attention to them, but it only seemed to make the situation worse.

I never wanted to abandon Frisk. I just wanted to be alone. And all I did was isolate them as well.

I'm guilty.

Knock, knock,  knock.

I exhaled air I didn't know I was holding. There it was again, though its rhythm faltered for a split second.

This never happened before. They always left after knocking twice. 

I scurried over to the door, kneeling on the floor, silently waiting again. Starting to feel sick in the stomach.

Knock, knock, knock, knock.

Those were faster.

"Sis?"

My eyes widened. The voice caught me off guard even if everything that had already happened was so new on its own. There were so many things around me that grounded me to the fact I was awake, but this could only be some kind of dream. I stayed silent, digging my nails on the door, throat tightening.

I couldn't speak. I was absolutely terrified of ruining this moment. Of opening my eyes and noticing it was a dream after all.

"Maddy, please..."

They never did know how to say my name, so, we made up nicknames like Maddy or Mado. They always got "-tsuki" wrong. I always said that they'd learn someday.

Eventually, as the years passed, they did, but they never stopped using the nicknames.

"I miss you."

I opened my eyes, looking up at the ceiling, searching for an answer. Searching for strength. The tears fell freely down my face and I sobbed. Could I just simply open the door? Forget everything I stood for? 

I stuttered, words sounding as weak as I felt.

"Me too."

They sighed, and we stayed quiet for a long moment. I could feel they were sitting by the door just like me 

I broke the silence with the first thing that I could think. "It's going to rain soon."

After staying quiet for an uncomfortably long time, making me wonder if they had left, they sighed. "Yeah, I noticed."

"Are mom and dad home?"

"No, mom went to work and I... don't know where dad is."

Fucking typical of him. "Didn't he..." I tried to keep my voice unaltered to mask my anger "Didn't he say anything when he left?"

"No. I was watching TV and I just heard the door."

"Right."

The silence crept back again, and I noticed how unreal this situation was. It had been a full month since I had heard Frisk's voice and I was simply... talking to them, pretending everything was okay and back to normal, while the door still separated us. 

"I have to go."

I closed my eyes and spoke. "Ok. Did you do your homework?"

Frisk stayed quiet as I heard them getting up. "I'm... going to do it now."

I nodded, and said for them to do what had to be done. I soon heard their steps getting farther and farther. I was left with only my company again.

I got up and sat by my table, beginning another page in my diary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! Comment what you thought, because it really helps me!  
> Next chapter shall be coming soon (I hope!)


	3. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on the chapter! I went through a long writing block, but I swear that the new chapters will arrive sooner! Do remember that I don't have a beta reader, so any help and criticism is welcome!
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: Alcohol mention, suicide contemplation, attempted suicide, and blood.

It started as a soft murmuring in the wind, just the perfect volume to keep me out of complete silence. Every once in a while a muted thunder roared a few miles away, echoing for a second or two. Then the storm arrived.  
  
Wind blew heavily on the glass door that led to the balcony, making a ghost-like noise. The water threatened to enter my room but didn't. I had been laying on my bed since finishing last night's entry on the diary. I kept it short, since remembering the dream, or nightmare, hell if l know, made the back of my skull ache. They were always so insistently present and yet last night felt like a blur.  
  
My eyes wandered to the balcony and the thoughts of just jumping and finally ending this hell came back to haunt me. Then I looked back at the door and the idea died along with a small part of my bitterness. Alas, I wouldn't be able to jump anyways.  
  
According to the old clock on my wall, 40 minutes had passed since Frisk and l spoke. I frowned and waited. Hopefully, I would be able to talk to Frisk once more. Ask how they were doing in school, to draw something and slid it down the door or just... try to catch up on basic sister things I used to do.  
  
Which was pathetic and useless, to say the least. It was wrong to fool Frisk into thinking everything would be back to normal, or fool myself for that matter.  
  
I pushed the thoughts to the back of my head and got up, making my way across the room to play NASU.

* * *

Just shortly after the clock counted 55 minutes I heard the front door slam shut, making my face twist into a grimace. Father must be home again, probably drunk out of his mind. I stopped caring a few years ago, after all, who was I to judge. But after that there was nothing. No sound. No steps, no objects falling, no TV turning on, just... absolute silence.  
  
Mother should be at work by now, and who knows for how much longer with this storm. So it was just me and Frisk. And my father... l hoped.  
  
58 minutes.  
  
The apartment was usually pretty noisy. Normally one would hear my parents discussing, the obnoxiously loud TV, and Frisk's frequent knocks filling the silence, so this felt unnerving, to say the least. Just the wind, the rain, and the soft ticking of my clock.  
  
Speaking of which, I looked up at it and started a mental countdown.  
  
5\. 4. 3. 2. 1.  
  
  
  
...  
  
  
  
...  
  
  
  
...  
  
  
  
Nothing.  
  
My chest filled with dread. This was definitely weird. Maybe they just forgot after talking to me today. Maybe that was their goal all along and now they'd leave me alone. Right? Right.  
  
Turning off the console, I got up again approaching the door and leaning in close to it to hear more, but the only thing that greeted me was silence. I frowned and considered my options while a particularly loud thunder roared outside.  
  
I could wait. That seemed like an easy choice. For all l knew, Frisk could be asleep early or they just didn't want to knock anymore. It was plausible.Though if something did happen I'd just loose time.  
  
I could call them, but they never used the cell phone mom gave them anyway, so that'd be unlikely.  
  
Or... l could go out.  
  
I frowned and shook my head. No, never. It would mean getting defeated by myself. Giving up after struggling would be weak. Though something inside me begged for it, l didn't need to do this.  
  
I crossed my arms, still debating what to do, even if the solution was ridiculously obvious.  
  
My hand reached for the doorknob slowly. If no one was home, it would just go unnoticed. Nobody needed to know, and everything would be okay.  
  
_Right?_  
  
Before I could stop myself, the door was already open.  
  
With a heavy sigh, I hesitantly took a look around. The apartment I spent most of my life in didn't look any different after a month. If anything, it looked like I never even left at all. The long corridor ahead of me led to the living room and right by my side was Frisk's room.  
  
I didn't hesitate to open their door when I noticed the deafening silence wouldn't end. Frisk's room wasn't unfamiliar to me, on the contrary. I spent so much time taking care of them by myself that I probably was more used to their room than my own.  
  
Though, the room didn't quite look like what I remembered.  
  
It was much smaller than mine, and the mess Frisk left behind made it harder to move through it. As I half-heartedly expected, they weren't there.  
  
I analysed the clustered toys and papers on the ground and bed. Frisk had never been messy, so this was surprising, if not worrying. Several drawings of different things caught my attention, and amongst the papers on their work desk, a history book was open.  
  
The conversation from one hour ago echoed in my head. Frisk did say they were going to do their homework but this seemed a tad too somber and complex for a kid their age. Old pictures of Mt. Ebott illustrated the pages, along with vague and much older paintings of, what the book described as, monsters. Now this was odd.  
  
Old legends always ran through the mouths of our city's folk, even if less commonly nowadays. Legends about monsters that lived peacefully among humans, until a war confined them underground. But they were nothing more than that; legends. No one taught this in schools, mainly to impressionable children.  
  
As I quickly read the passage about the mountain, a particular paragraph stood out.  
  
"Several people, some of them children, who have climbed the mountain along the years went missing. Searches for them were always short lived as most people fear they will vanish too. Even if nothing links the mountain, or the monsters underneath it, to the disappearances, it is strongly advised that you shouldn't climb Mt. Ebott under any circumstance."  
  
In the blink of an eye, everything fell into place.  
  
_Frisk ran away._  
  
My heart drummed against my chest harshly and I looked around the room dumbfounded. The door, the mess, everything made sense. I rushed to the front door, stopping by the kitchen to grab an umbrella, only to notice that it was missing.  
  
"Shit."  
  
I slammed open the door and rushed down the fire escape stairs. I had no time to wait for the elevator. As I reached the first floor, I noticed the rain was stronger than before, whooshing against the windows with the strength of a tornado.  
  
The mountain wasn't too far away from my building, but the rain made it harder to see where I was going. Not a living soul dared to go out of their houses, so the sidewalks were empty, even if cars constantly speeded by me.  
  
When I got to the base of the mountain the rain didn't show any signs of stopping. The thunders sounded closer and the trees seemed like they could fall at any given moment.  
  
And then I ran.  
  
With all the strength I didn't know I had, or just didn't have at all, I pushed past branches, jumped trough the rocky path of the mountain and ran. The rush of adrenaline carried me to the top of the mountain recklessly.  
  
If there was one last thing I wanted to do before I died, it would be making sure Frisk could be safe. Even after death, there was no way I could bear the pain of not finding them tonight.  
  
I stopped and spun around wildly, becoming aware of the rain again. It plunked onto me and the muddy earth, clouding my vision and making me breathe even harder. The wind shook the trees and blew more and more water against me. It almost felt like drowning.  
  
I yelled, frantically trying to run again. "Frisk! Please! Don't--"  
  
The phrase couldn't leave my lips in time as I felt my feet getting caught on a root from a huge tree. I fell on my knees, losing the rest of balance l had, and landed on my chest, getting the wind knocked out of me.  
  
My nails grabbed the earth as I cried in pain. And despair and sadness and anger and every last thing I could feel that I didn't even remember l could. There was no time for me to examine the damage the fall caused, so I rose up, holding the tree firmly.  
  
_"F-Frisk."_  
  
The tears ran freely down my face, mixing with the raindrops. I couldn't give up, I had already done so much. I sobbed, lifting a bloody hand to my mouth and looked down.  
  
Footsteps. Almost invisible under the rain on the soft mud of the mountain. They were small and could easily be recent.  
  
I gasped. Newfound strength washing over me as l forced myself upright and followed the marks on the ground, approaching their destiny.  
  
I felt my throat protest as l got ready to call for Frisk again.  
  
And that's when I saw them.  
  
We both stood still, completely frozen. Frisk didn't notice me behind them, seeming too focused on the gigantic hole in front of them. The umbrella they took was on the ground by their side, closed and forgotten. Their clothes seemed intact, if just a little bit wet due to the rain. I didn't know for how long we both stood there, or how long Frisk had been there before I arrived.  
  
l could be imagining this. Maybe l didn't find them after all.  
  
"Frisk...?"  
  
Their body seemed to come to life suddenly, tensing up at the sound of my voice, and they turned just a little too quickly to look at me.  
  
Their watery eyes and shocked expression were the last things l saw before they slipped on the mud and fell into the darkness, silent and slowly.  
  
_**"NO!"**_  
  
I didn't know how to react, running to the border of the abyss, almost as if there was still hope of saving them. I choked on my own sobs. It was too late, I was too slow. I lost the last thing that still kept me alive.  
  
I dug my fingers into my hair, breathing heavily. I couldn't just turn back, face my parents and tell them l let my sibling fall down a hole on the top of Mt. Ebott and just lock myself up again. Even if I survived my parents wrath, I wouldn't be able to sleep again, or live with myself.  
  
I let my hands fall at my sides and tilted my head downwards. The hole seemed bottomless, there wasn't even a noise that suggested Frisk had landed.  
  
I turned around, looking back to the path I came from and to the city surrounding the mountain. Had the rainclouds not existed, the view would be phenomenal. The only thing l could vaguely make out amidst the fog was my building. I let out a shaky laugh and closed my eyes.  
  
That's what l was going to do anyways, I had to remind myself.  
  
Breathe in.  
  
I opened my arms, like wings, and tilted back, feeling the wind blow on my hair and everything around me get darker and darker and darker.  
  
_Breathe out._


End file.
